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DiaryThis is Jan's diary. If you want to receive this diary by mail, write your mail on the contact form.
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San José (see on map)
On Saturday night I stretched out on the bed next to Alexandra, and I began to stir, unable to sleep. It was the second day we´d arrived to Costa Rica and had been hosted by two guys and a girl very hospitable and friendly. Nevertheless, doubts have resurfaced in my mind. I could not help wondering if it was time to abandon the trip and return home. It was not the first time I had these thoughts, but before long I was convinced that there was only another year of adventures. All we need more is to cross the South American continent before the end of the initial project and learn about the diverse cultures of the world for six years. We had already traveled much of Europe, Africa, Middle East, Asia and North and Central America, lived intense moments, we made unforgettable friends, discovering fascinating traditions, visited captivating places ... And only we were missing another year. In fact, both (Alexandra and me)had the illusion to visit South America, knew that the continent will marvel us, but at the same time we felt very tired. During the first years of the travel I had not had this problem, but for weeks or months we were feeling so tired every time we had to change the of city every few days, sleeping in different beds, sometimes in uncomfortable rooms and with no privacy. We were still discovering nice places, but I let myself cost more seduced by its magic. We were still getting to know interesting people, but I was less anxious to absorb their knowledge.
We only had a year and this was precisely the problem. Almost from the beginning of the journey through America, Alexandra and I had remained with a part of our minds anchored at home, making plans for our return. Relatively there was little until our return and we could not leave the future plans for the last minute. Alexandra wanted to sell products purchased in India and I wanted to write books, a project that started before the trip. We were too excited about the return and often I had to restrain Alexandra, for example, she began to imagine ways on how we could decorate the apartment we currently have rented.
There was another problem. After publishing the book of adventures in Africa I had begun to write a book that initially I intended to start writing once we arrived to Catalonia. From so much imagining the future I had advanced the plans. It will be a book of philosophy about a theme that I am very interested in, entitled ´How to live happily without free will,´ the first book in a series that I plan to write. The book kept me locked up many hours in various hotel rooms, consulting the Internet, reading and writing. However, I forced myself out to explore the different cities and places where we were. But the book continued to occupy much of my mind, making me lose interest in talks with other travelers or local friends and the places visited, which were attractive, only to photograph. Inevitably I wondered if my dream was to become a writer, what was the meaning of continuing the trip?. During the early years, the trip had helped me gather very valuable knowledge for my desired career, but now I was failing in absorbing new information. I felt ready to start writing some of my conclusions.
We only had a year of travel, but I had long since decided not considered it a failure a possible early ending of this long project. The one thing I had clear was that I wanted to follow the path that would make me happier, but which was it? I went round and round in bed thinking about the appropriate response, waking often Alexandra scream to stop moving. I concluded that I would be happier back home. But I thought I could postpone my decision until after arriving in Colombia, where we had ticket in two weeks from Panama. However, if in Colombia I had to make the same decision, it may not be necessary to wait that long.
I wanted to discuss my concerns with Alexandra, but I could not do it. I knew that if I offered the possibility to go home early, Alexandra would not let me close this door so easily. I took another turn in bed and Alexandra complained again that she cannot sleep. I raised my voice and said: ´Alex, I have to say something.´ ´Shut up and let me sleep.´ I thought, ´she will lose this´ and I kept thinking a what I had to do. Imagine what our return would be like and the image was quite positive. I woke up and said ´I have to tell you something.´ ´Shut up!´ ´I´m thinking of returning home soon.´ This woke her up immediately: ´When?´ I asked. ´Soon, as soon as possible, what do you think?´ There was no need to ask her, Alexandra was very pleased: ´Yes, we go home. Later we can return to America and end this part of the journey.´ Alexandra was right. It was not necessary to end the trip, later, maybe in a few years, we could return to South America and visit all the countries that surely are so captivating. Now we needed to rest and begin other projects that will bring us more happiness.
Thank you for following our journey. In the future we shall return. A hug for everyone!
When I met Jan I never thought that this project could take place for so long but I joined and had the best time of my life. We lived amazing experiences that count for a life time. I learned so much about the world and myself. But the travel is not all that we are and we felt we need to begin other things in our lives and have more perspectives. The last few months have been quite enjoyable, the travel turned much easier but in the same time the heaviness of all the years of travel, 5 more exactly, were hanging deeply on our backs making us quite tired whenever we had to change from one place to the other, whenever we had to say goodbye to good friends from the road, whenever we had to cross a new border. We felt it is time to go back for many months but we kept it quiet admiring the new cultures and places that were unfolding through our eyes. More and more there was a big silence between us about the subject of going back home because Jan knew I wanted it and I needed it but slowly he began to feel the same. The project Globetour is not at it´s end, we will continue in one way or other, following new paths, contributing to new projects and surely travelling again at some point. Our lived changed thanks to this travel, we have so many good friends thanks to this journey and in a way this travel pictured our future.
Thank you all and hopefully see you again in Catalunya, our home or somewhere in Europe.